Recently I had the privilege to spend 14 days with a group of exceptional people as they progressed through a very challenging
program to become certified Trainers – not just ordinary Trainers, but outstanding Trainers who are able to deliver content and facilitate a room without the ‘crutch’ of utilising PowerPoint, and indeed without notes. As I witnessed the transformations of the individuals over the 2 weeks, there were many lessons and insights I was able to identify and absorb, and as I reflect now on the journey they have travelled together, there is one significant distinction that stands above all else – and that is, their ability to respond versus react.
On Day 1, each of the Trainers were expected to present 20 minutes of content in a specific format, and then for each subsequent presentation, there was another nuance, another requirement, another component added in to add to the challenge – whether it be a new story, delivering in a specific Archetype (character) or in a specific tone of voice. With each presentation, the level of difficulty increased, and as each Trainer faced the new challenge, they all had a choice – simply react to the challenge being thrown at them, or choose how to respond. For many people who are thrown a challenge that they are not expecting or they believe is difficult, their immediate reaction could be:
‘This is too hard…., or
This is not fair……, or
I haven’t had enough time to prepare…., or
I can’t do it……, or
Why me?’
In other words they are reacting to a situation, often emotionally, and as a result, the situation is in control, and they are handing over responsibility to the situation, externalising the responsibility.
What I noticed with the Trainers though, was that they handled the challenges thrown at them in a completely different way, and rather than reacting to the situation like outlined above, they took their time to absorb the situation, internalised it, and then looked at what options they had in order to respond to the challenge. By using this strategy, they were in control of the situation, and could move forward with confidence and take responsibility for their actions. What was also fascinating about this strategy was that the engagement of the audience increased when the Trainers responded to a challenge, versus reacting to it. They demonstrated a level of maturity and responsibility, and hence credibility with the audience, which allowed them to deliver an even more compelling presentation. It really reinforced the powerful truth that when you take responsibility for how you choose to respond to what happens to you, you have many options, you can maintain control and you can move forward.
I’m curious – when you are thrown a challenge, or when something happens to you, do you react immediately, or do you carefully absorb what has happened, and then choose your response? What do you normally do when someone cuts in front of you on the freeway, or when someone accuses you of doing something you didn’t do? Do you react, or do you respond? If you normally react, I’d like to throw a challenge at you – for the next 30 days, when something happens that you are not expecting, instead of reacting, do this:
- Absorb the challenge
- Think about the challenge and why this could have been thrown at you.
- Identify what positive learning or lesson could be wrapped up in the challenge that will allow you to grow.
- Identify what options you may have in order to deal with the challenge
- Select an option and respond.
If you find yourself reacting to a situation rather than responding, during the 30 days, start the 30 days over again.
After you have completed this exercise for 30 days, I would love for you to notice what is different about the challenges you face, and the way you see your world. Notice how more empowered you feel, and how you are actively seeking more responsibility and perhaps even searching for bigger and bigger challenges!! This is a wonderful indication that you are growing and developing, and you may also notice that you are attracting higher quality people into your life and/or business. And that is a good thing.
Take the 30 day challenge – choose to respond rather than react, and share with me what you experienced, I’d love to hear from you. Send me an email at darren@potentialunleashed.com.au
To your continued success!
Darren